Day in the Life of Sir Coonfoxable. (Also known as Arson.)

Woke up. Alarm clock is fucking loud. Throw it at wall. Go back to sleep. Woke up again. Mom is fucking loud. Sludge out of bed slowly. I am a parrot today. What? No, I'm not. That doesn't make sense. No more dreams about giant gummy bears and flying palm trees, its time for the real world. My mom could be a camel. Maybe she is... how would I know? I don't. OH MY GOD MY MOM IS A MOTHERFUCKING CAMEL. Wait. No. I'm awake. My mom is not a camel. Who is my mom? I can't remember. OH She's my mom! Ha. I'm so silly.


I think I'll wear pig tails today. I look like 5 year old me. Or a crack head. I can't decide. Good 'nuff.

-Teeth brushing, clothes, yada yada-

DOWNSTAIRS.

"Three million pregnant women died of aids today while falling out of a plane landing on baby puppies, killing themselves, babies, and puppies."

Depressing radio new. NPR. Great way to start the day. I have finally woken up. I eat my morning orange and head out.

Drool through Spanish class.
Groan through Advisory.
Doodle through equity.

Mate circle at lunch! Philosophy talking... and mate. (Mate is pronounced MAW-TAY) Mate is a heavily caffeinated, hot, herbal drink.

Brain: Hey Zannaaaa drink some mateeee
Me: Well, caffeine makes me freak out. I shouldn't.
Brain: PFFFFSHHHH. ARMADILLO SOCKS.
Me: Fine, you do have a valid point. I'll drink some mate.

I sip the mate.

I go to Lit. (LITERATURE CLASS. OF READING. AND. THINGS.)
I have a presentation. Fuck.

Caffeine has kicked in a lot by now. The walls start moving.

I shake through the presentation.
I sleep through the rest of class.
I derp through art.

Days over.

I float over to the car, I stare at it for 20 minutes.

That looks like my car. The headlights are too yellow, it's not my car. My mom waves her hand out of the window.
Oh. That is my car.
I get in, we get my sister. She just arrived yesterday from New York.
We eat chinese food.

Now the caffeine REALLY kicks in. It triggers up my panic and I'm in jello world!

NOTHING is real. Nothing is there. My sister floats around in the air. When she talks the words bounce around in my toilet paper brain.
Octopi clocks.

I take half a Xanax. It tastes like elephant toes.
Yucky.

No more jello world.

I feel better, we go home.

Now I'm here.
...and I missed my kickboxing.

Dammit.

If you read all that you can have one of my organs.


http://artemis-f-fox.deviantart.com/ <-Where the good stuff like that's at.